SW Community
Closed Strip Club

Bare Assets Melbourne

Melbourne, FL 4020 W New Haven Ave 321-952-4291
Closed Opens 12:00 today
Strip Club Topless 21+
Hours
MON 12:00 - 02:00 TODAY
TUE 12:00 - 02:00
WED 12:00 - 02:00
THU 12:00 - 02:00
FRI 12:00 - 02:00
SAT 12:00 - 02:00
SUN 12:00 - 02:00
On tap
Kitchen
0/100
How this is scored
0/100
How property is scored
HOW PROPERTY IS SCORED

Property weighting

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

PROPERTY · 0/100

The room

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Atmosphere 3.4
  • Location 5.1
  • Privacy 1.0
  • Parking 8.0
  • Luxury 2.1
  • Amenities 4.3
  • Capacity 1.0
0/100
How service is scored
HOW SERVICE IS SCORED

Service weighting

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

SERVICE · 0/100

The hospitality

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Door service 1.0
  • Bar service 8.0
  • Speed 4.3
  • Respect 2.6
  • Safety 1.7
  • Cleanliness 1.0
  • Value 4.3
0/100
How food is scored
HOW FOOD IS SCORED

Food weighting

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

FOOD · 0/100

The kitchen

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Food quality 1.0
  • Food prices 1.0
  • Drink prices 4.3
  • Bottle prices 1.0
  • Luxury 2.1
  • Cigars & hookah 2.8
  • Value 4.3
0/100
How performers is scored
HOW PERFORMERS IS SCORED

Performers weighting

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

PERFORMERS · 0/100

The floor

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Talent quality 3.4
  • Appearance & style 5.1
  • Interaction 1.7
  • Professionalism 1.7
  • VIP value 1.0
  • Dance value 2.8
HOW IT'S SCORED

Overall SW Score weighting

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

SW SCORE · 0/100

How scoring works

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.

Dimension scores
  • Property 0
  • Service 0
  • Food 0
  • Performers 0
  • Value 0
Rate this club

Your take, one tap at a time.

A quick 6-step walkthrough — 4 categories of spiderweb ratings plus a written review at the end. Takes about 2 minutes.

0 of 27 rated

What the floor said

0 reviews
80/100 SW score
Good drinks, great parking, just watch your wallet Came here for a bachelor party and the bartender Kayla was genuinely on point—kept the drinks flowing and actually remembered our orders. Free parking was clutch since the lot's huge. Only thing is, the dancers seemed pretty checked out, like they weren't interested in talking to us at all. Still worth a visit if you manage expectations.
50/100 SW score
Decent bar, but the vibe is off I've been coming here for a while and the bar service is solid, but lately something feels wrong. The atmosphere is flat, dancers are dismissive, and I've heard too many sketchy stories from other guys about money going missing. The place has potential but it needs to get its act together on the customer respect front.
30/100 SW score
Not coming back First time at a strip club and this wasn't it. The whole place felt cheap and unwelcoming—dancers ignored me, the atmosphere was dead, and honestly I felt uncomfortable the whole time. Yeah, parking was easy and the bar wasn't terrible, but that's not enough to overlook how unsafe this place feels.
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