Brass Pole Cabaret

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Dingy rooms with questionable parking options.

The rooms are dingy and cramped, with parking options that are more chaotic than convenient. The location is okay, but it's not like it's in a great part of town. If you're looking for luxury, keep looking.

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Slow, unfriendly service, but with a few redeeming bartenders.

Service is slow and unfriendly, but there are a few bartenders who try their best. The respect from staff is lacking, and safety concerns are real. If you value good service, you'll be disappointed. Otherwise, you might find some decent interactions with the bartenders.

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Don't bother with the overpriced, subpar eats.

The food here is a total disappointment. Overpriced and subpar, it's not worth the money. The drink prices are a bit more reasonable, but don't expect anything special. If you're hungry, bring a snack.

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Some decent dancing, but mostly forgettable acts.

The performers are a mixed bag. Some of the dancers are decent, but most of the acts are forgettable. The appearance style is inconsistent, and professionalism is lacking. If you're looking for a great show, you might find something here, but don't expect to be blown away.

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

Elyria's worst-kept secret.

Brass Pole Cabaret is Elyria's worst-kept secret. It's a messy, unimpressive experience that barely justifies its low prices. If you're desperate for a cheap night out, you might find something here, but don't expect much.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.