Hoops

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Narrow, deep layout with basketball court floor, locker-bar, and bright TVs—clean but cramped for a Manhattan room.

The room is a long, narrow corridor that opens into a larger stage area—think basketball court theme with a locker-bar, mirrored walls, and 15+ flat-screens tuned to sports. Bright lighting (unusual for a strip club) and clean bathrooms are pluses. The layout lets you hang at the bar and watch games without feeling isolated, but it sacrifices intimacy and feels cramped on busy nights. Parking is street-only on 33rd near Herald Square, which is brutal; the real win is proximity to Penn Station and Times Square—if you're already in Midtown, it's a 10-minute walk.

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Doormen and bartenders genuinely helpful; coat check optional but tipped; no-nonsense, low-pressure floor.

Doormen are chill and often waive cover if you print the free-entry voucher from their website—do this. Bartenders are attentive and fast. The coat check is optional but expect to tip a dollar or two. Staff respect boundaries and don't hustle you aggressively; one reviewer noted dancers seemed almost disengaged on slow nights. Safety felt adequate (one reviewer mentioned a vaccination check at entry post-COVID), though one noted a low safety sub-score. Overall, the service is straightforward and friendly without being slick.

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Complimentary fries at the bar; drinks pricey (~$20 cocktails as of 2023 reviews); water costs $10.

The kitchen is not a draw. Complimentary fries come with a bar seat, and food quality is decent but basic. Cocktails run ~$20 after tip (2023 reviews), and bottled water is marked up to $10 (specifically Fiji, per reviews). No cigar or hookah service. If you're hungry, grab food before you arrive or hit the Asian restaurants nearby on 33rd.

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Diverse roster (Latinas, Eastern European, Black dancers); older average age; $20 lap dances, $400+ VIP—inconsistent hustle.

The floor skews older and more mixed than Rick's, with a solid Latina presence plus Eastern European and Black dancers. On game nights, reviewers found 10–15 dancers; on slow nights, expect 5–6 and long stretches with no one on stage. Lap dances are $20 (reviewers 2018–2025), and dancers vary on touching rules—ask first. VIP is expensive (~$400–$1,100 per reviews 2019–2025), much steeper than Rick's, and reviewers found the value poor. Interaction is friendly but uneven; some dancers engage freely, others seem bored. Best bet: come during a major game when the roster is fuller and the energy lifts.

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

Midtown sports-bar hybrid next to Rick's: free cover, mixed talent, thin crowds on most nights.

Hoops trades traditional strip-club gloss for a sports-bar energy: you're here to watch games and get lap dances, not to feel pampered. The free cover (or $20 if you miss the website voucher) and no-pressure vibe attract solo guys and small groups, but reviewers consistently report thin crowds except during major sporting events. Talent ranges from genuinely attractive to noticeably older; the floor works best on game days when the room fills up. It's a legitimate alternative to the upscale Rick's next door, not a replacement.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.