SW Community
Closed Strip Club

Platinum 84

Federal Heights, CO 8485 Umatilla St 720-540-9333
Closed
Strip Club Topless 21+
Hours
Hours not published.
On tap
Kitchen
61/100

All-around disaster.

This club feels like a messy compromise on every level. From the cramped, dingy space to the awful door service, it's clear the owners are phoning it in. If you're looking for a cheap, forgettable experience, maybe this is for you, but otherwise, avoid it.

How this is scored
66/100

Cramped, dingy space with no luxury.

The cramped space and dingy decor make it hard to find any luxury vibes here. The location is also tough to get to, and parking is a nightmare. Unless you're okay with a cramped, smoky space, you might want to look elsewhere.

How property is scored
HOW PROPERTY IS SCORED

Property weighting

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

PROPERTY · 66/100

The room

Cramped, dingy space with no luxury.

The cramped space and dingy decor make it hard to find any luxury vibes here. The location is also tough to get to, and parking is a nightmare. Unless you're okay with a cramped, smoky space, you might want to look elsewhere.

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Atmosphere 7.0
  • Location 6.0
  • Privacy 6.0
  • Parking 8.0
  • Luxury 2.8
  • Amenities 7.0
  • Capacity 7.0
64/100

Awful door service and zero respect.

The door service was a major letdown, with a complete lack of respect for customers. The bar service was also slow and unfriendly. If you're looking for a club with great service, look elsewhere.

How service is scored
HOW SERVICE IS SCORED

Service weighting

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

SERVICE · 64/100

The hospitality

Awful door service and zero respect.

The door service was a major letdown, with a complete lack of respect for customers. The bar service was also slow and unfriendly. If you're looking for a club with great service, look elsewhere.

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Door service 7.0
  • Bar service 6.0
  • Speed 5.1
  • Respect 7.0
  • Safety 7.0
  • Cleanliness 7.0
  • Value 5.1
48/100

Terrible food and drinks at highway robbery prices.

The food and drinks at this club are an absolute rip-off. Prices are highway robbery, and the quality is subpar. If you're looking for a place to grab a bite, you're better off going somewhere else.

How food is scored
HOW FOOD IS SCORED

Food weighting

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

FOOD · 48/100

The kitchen

Terrible food and drinks at highway robbery prices.

The food and drinks at this club are an absolute rip-off. Prices are highway robbery, and the quality is subpar. If you're looking for a place to grab a bite, you're better off going somewhere else.

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Food quality 1.0
  • Food prices 1.0
  • Drink prices 5.0
  • Bottle prices 5.1
  • Luxury 2.8
  • Cigars & hookah 5.1
  • Value 5.1
61/100

Great dancers with zero interaction or professionalism.

The dancers at this club are some of the best I've seen, but the lack of interaction and professionalism from the performers is a major turn-off. If you're looking for a club with great dancers and a fun atmosphere, you might enjoy this place, but be prepared for some awkward interactions.

How performers is scored
HOW PERFORMERS IS SCORED

Performers weighting

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

PERFORMERS · 61/100

The floor

Great dancers with zero interaction or professionalism.

The dancers at this club are some of the best I've seen, but the lack of interaction and professionalism from the performers is a major turn-off. If you're looking for a club with great dancers and a fun atmosphere, you might enjoy this place, but be prepared for some awkward interactions.

Sub-metrics (0-10)
  • Talent quality 7.0
  • Appearance & style 7.0
  • Interaction 7.0
  • Professionalism 6.0
  • VIP value 4.3
  • Dance value 5.0
HOW IT'S SCORED

Overall SW Score weighting

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

SW SCORE · 61/100

How scoring works

All-around disaster.

This club feels like a messy compromise on every level. From the cramped, dingy space to the awful door service, it's clear the owners are phoning it in. If you're looking for a cheap, forgettable experience, maybe this is for you, but otherwise, avoid it.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.

Dimension scores
  • Property 66
  • Service 64
  • Food 48
  • Performers 61
  • Value 51
Rate this club

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0 of 27 rated

What the floor said

157 reviews
80/100 SW score
Perfect for late night Love that this place is open 24/7 - came by at 3am after work and it was still lively. Parking was easy which is a huge plus downtown. The glass brick dance area is cool but you can still see through it somewhat.
60/100 SW score
Decent but nothing fancy Stopped in while in town for work. It's definitely not the most upscale spot but gets the job done. Good selection of dancers and the outdoor patio was nice for a smoke break. Just don't expect VIP treatment even if you're paying VIP prices.
50/100 SW score
Changed a lot since Dreamhouse days Been coming here since it was Dreamhouse and the new management hasn't really improved things. Sure, parking is still great, but the whole place feels pretty basic now. Dancers set their own prices which can get ridiculous fast.
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