Rumors

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Three stages, wraparound bar, pool tables; bright and roomy but no VIP seclusion.

The club is genuinely spacious—three stages, a long wraparound bar, pool tables, and plenty of seating—but that openness works against it; there's no back area, no booths, no privacy. Parking is paid ($3–$5), and the lot often looks busier than the room actually is. Reviewers note the layout feels oddly bright and exposed for a strip club, more like a hangout bar than a nightclub. Best for low-key afternoon visits; evenings, the lack of seclusion and sparse VIP options become liabilities.

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Approachable staff and security; bar service slow during busy times, restrooms clean.

Staff—bartenders, security, managers—are consistently described as friendly and drama-free, with security approachable and helpful. Bar service lags during busier times, and one reviewer noted the bartender wouldn't serve drinks until patrons sat down. Cleanliness is solid, restrooms are functional, and door entry is quick (no pat-down required). Safety is reliable. Overall hospitable but not slick; service matches the laid-back vibe rather than catering to high-touch expectations.

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Drinks standard ($5–$7 beer, $3–$4 water); small pours, no food standouts noted.

Drinks are standard-priced ($5–$7 beer, $3–$4 water, $7 shots); a tab for two Heinekens, two Hennessies, and two shots ran ~$60. Pours are notably small—reviewers complained drinks "barely do anything." No food kitchen is mentioned in reviews, and the club's website advertises a restaurant that reviewers note doesn't materialize. Cigar/hookah available. Not a destination for food or premium bottles; drinks are functional and cheap, not a highlight.

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Black-majority roster, mostly 6–8s in looks, attentive but sparse during day shift.

The roster is predominantly Black, with a few white and Latina dancers; looks range from 5–8, with most reviewers rating them 6–8. Dancers are attentive and approach patrons readily, and reviewers praise the lack of drama and genuine friendliness. During day shift, expect one dancer on stage; nights, multiple performers. Lap dances are $10 and include grinding. The trade-off: daytime talent is sparse, and reviewers note many dancers sit glued to their phones during slow hours. Professionalism and interaction are solid; VIP/private options are minimal or nonexistent.

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

Spacious daytime hangout with $10 dances, variable crowds, parking fee stings.

Rumors occupies the old Crazy Horse building on Jonesboro Rd in Forest Park—a sprawling, well-lit room that works better as a daytime refuge than a nighttime destination. Parking runs $3–$5 depending on the day; no cover charge afternoons, $10–$20 nights. Lap dances hold steady at $10, and reviewers consistently praise the attentive dancer rotation and low-drama vibe. The catch: daytime crowds are genuinely thin (one or two dancers on stage), and the bright, open layout kills any sense of intimacy or VIP exclusivity.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.