The Ace of Clubs

Property weighs 7 sub-metrics — atmosphere, location, privacy, parking, luxury, amenities, capacity — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 property score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Rundown building, nowhere to park, cramped.

The building itself is a disaster: atmosphere is nonexistent, luxury is a joke, amenities don't exist, location is forgettable, parking is impossible, and privacy is zero. You'll feel cramped and unwelcome the moment you walk in.

Service weighs 7 sub-metrics — door, bar, speed, respect, safety, clean, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 service score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Rude, slow, dirty, unsafe.

Every hospitality metric tanks: door staff are indifferent, bar service is slow and careless, staff show no respect, safety is questionable, and cleanliness is visibly bad. Expect to be ignored, rushed, or worse.

Food weighs 7 sub-metrics — quality, price, drinks, bottles, luxury, cigar, value — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 food score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Overpriced swill, stale snacks.

Drinks are overpriced garbage, bottles are a ripoff, food quality is nonexistent, and prices don't match what you get. The kitchen and bar are both phoning it in.

Performers weighs 6 sub-metrics — talent, style, interact, pro, vip, dance — each scored 0–10. They roll up into the single 0–100 performers score.

Signals come from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. The overall dot on the radar is the average shape across these sub-metrics.

Unprofessional, disinterested, avoid.

Talent is nonexistent, dancers look disinterested, interaction is cold, professionalism is absent, and VIP/dance value is worthless. You're paying to watch people who don't want to be there.

Each point on the radar is a dimension scored 0–100, weighted by how much it shapes a night out. Balanced shapes mean well-rounded clubs; spikes mean a venue excels at one thing but not others.

Tap any dimension's own info icon to see which sub-metrics feed into it.

Skip it entirely.

The Ace of Clubs is a complete zero across every dimension. Nothing works here—the space is falling apart, the staff doesn't care, the drinks are bad, the dancers are checked out. There's no reason to go.

SW Score is a weighted composite across four dimensions — property, service, food, and performers — measured across 27 sub-metrics and a separate value score.

Sub-metric signals are pulled from verified reviews, venue data, and website text. Each dimension rolls up into a 0-100 score, which feeds the weighted overall.

How to read the shape: a balanced radar means a well-rounded club. A spiked shape means it excels at one thing and not others. Tap any dimension below for its full breakdown.